"......I didn't mean this," he says. And I looked at him straight in the eyes and said, "You tried to have me killed twice. That's not forgivable."

It all started on a fateful day in October. I met Dane at a small store in town. He had run into me as I was entering and after he apologized we sat down at a little cafe up the street and talked. A few days later we were dating and two years after that we were getting married in a small stone church. We moved in together and began thinking about a family. We had fights like normal couples do and we made up like the rest. But then they came. Those men took me away from him. They did horrible things to me and......I couldn't stop them. And when I finally broke free; when I finally escaped and ran home months later, Dane said that he didn't love me anymore. He had found a new girlfriend and had gotten a divorce while I had been tortured and raped by a gang of evil men. I had been chained in an insulated prison underground and he hadn't even looked for me. He had just moved on. He says that he'd thought I had run out on him. Hadn't the broken glass and the specks of blood not given him a clue that I hadn't gone on my own? That I had struggled? As I walked away from my own house and all my things I cried for the first time in years. I have so many scars but the one that now hurts the most is the one no one can see. It's the one on my heart.

Even though all I wanted was to go back and confess all that I'd gone through, I kept walking. Over the next few days I unconsciously began to wander my old house, my steps retracing steps that had once been so familiar. And one day when I had let my mind wander and I was walking past that house I saw Dane standing on the front porch with a man in a black business suit. They were talking and as I inched closer I could hear what Dane was saying. "You didn't complete your side of the bargain. She's still breathing. She came back the other day. I want her dead, Tom. Do you understand me?" His words had made my blood run cold. Who was he talking about? "We won't fail this time. I promise you that. That minx is going to be dead by nightfall tomorrow," the man who obviously was named Tom said as Dane handed him a stack of bills. "Good. I'll be over at the compound tonight. Have her there by then." Tom nodded and when he turned to leave I ducked behind a trashcan, my heart pounding and frozen. It was him. The man who had abducted me. And then I knew. Dane had been talking about me.

Dane had gone back inside by the time Tom had gotten into his car. I ran after him as the car drifted farther and farther away. Finally it stopped at an abandoned house. I went down to it, watching as Tom went inside. Looking into a dusty window I saw all three of the men who had tortured and raped me over that past few months standing there in the living room apparently receiving orders. They all nodded and I watched as they opened the cabinet by the fireplace and retrieved weapons. Suddenly Tom spots me, yelling at the others to catch me. I ran around front ducking low as bullets whizzed past me. I hid in the shed, waiting for them to look inside and see me. Fear began to pump through my veins until I was out of my mind. I picked up a heavy metal shovel and waited until the coast was clear. I knew that I had to go inside if I wanted to live. I had to get to the weapons cabinet in the living room if I wanted to stand a chance. I ran inside hiding just inside the door and heard footsteps coming closer. I banged the shovel down the man's head, knocking him out cold and I took his pistol and extra ammunition. One down, two to go. I popped in the clip, carrying the shovel with me just in case and I waited in the corner for the other two to come running in to check on their friend. Sure enough Tom and the other came rushing in. I swung the shovel over the one's head, not wanting to hear the sickening crack that erupted as the blade of the shovel connected with his head. Tom whirled his hand going for the pistol on his hip. But I got to mine first. I shot him but not before he could shoot me as well. I staggered back a step as Tom fell to the floor with a head shot and as his bullet hit me in the shoulder. Pain swelled inside me as I heard something from outside. I braced myself and gripped the pistol tighter.

Suddenly the door slammed open and there was Dane. The shock on his face was painful to see. He hadn't thought I could take care of myself. And truthfully neither had I. And this is where you came in. "Amanda," he said softly as I pulled my pistol up to aim at his heart. "You're bleeding, doll." My shirt was running red down from my shoulder like a macabre waterfall and I ignored him, not letting him distract me. "You lied to me," I said softly. "Please forgive me. I didn't mean this," he says. And I looked at him straight in the eyes and said, "You tried to have me killed twice. That's not forgivable." "I see," he says an arm reaching behind him to the waistband of his jeans. "You were never meant to know any of this but I let you get too close. And now you have to die," he yelled, pulling a pistol out aiming for my heart; the heart he'd already broken too many times. And I pulled the trigger as he did. Dane fell back out the door, hitting his head on the concrete steps. And I stepped back a step, hearing the police sirens screaming to a stop outside the house. I looked down again and saw a new crimson rose rising from my white shirt. A red flower growing from my middle of my chest. And I began to cry. A police officer ran inside, his pistol raised as he stared at the gun in my hand. The pistol dropped from my limp hand, tears streaming down my face. I faced the officer as his gaze then drifted to the blood seeping through my shirt, saying weakly, "It wasn't my fault. It wasn't my fault." And I collapsed.

I woke in a sterile white hospital room surrounded by policemen and I recognized the one who had come in on me. "Thank you," I whispered, my throat dry. And he smiled a brilliant smile. "Those men hurt you. Personally I think you did a good job of getting revenge. Don't worry though. The doctors saw the extent of the scars you have. You aren't going to be tried for this. The judge wouldn't allow it." The kindness in his voice made me smile and I nodded. "Since you probably already know mine, what's your name?" I asked and he smiled. "Trent." And I told him everything.

"Wow, you must have been terrified. I don't think I'd have been able to do that," he says when I finish my story. Then wincing as pain erupted in my shoulder and chest, I propped myself up on my elbow. "I doubt that. You came rushing right on in back at that house. But what happened after I passed out?" A dark red blush colored his cheeks as another policeman choked out a laugh. "I....uh carried you outside to the ambulance. And well, we arrested the one perpetrator by the door. He was the only one still alive at that point. And I rode to the hospital with you." I smiled and sighed. "Well I have a feeling that I'll be out of this hospital bed later. Would you like to have dinner with me?"

And this starts another chapter in my life. Trent and I started dating almost instantly after we met and soon after we married. I have a good feeling about this one. In the midst of tragedy I found real love that's lasted me a lifetime. Who would have thought that you had to kill somebody to find love?