The Color Of The Inside Of My Mouth | Teen Ink

The Color Of The Inside Of My Mouth MAG

January 22, 2009
By Bassoonkelley GOLD, Tampa, Florida
Bassoonkelley GOLD, Tampa, Florida
15 articles 0 photos 49 comments

I wipe at my stupid eyes with the back of my hand, and it startles me for a second that my tears are gray. I dunno why it surprised me; I mean, I buy the s***ty mascara that’s $1.99 in the 20 Items or Less checkout lane. Why spend oodles of green on something I hardly ever use?

I just wanted to look nice, you know? Like those girls who’re just naturally fake pretty. The girls who can blend shades of eyeshadow like no one’s business, and match their lipstick to the exact color of their toenail polish or whatever. Seemingly effortless, yet impeccably coordinated.

This is good stuff, I should write for a living – solely on the subject of beauty queens with superiority complexes, of course.

I just want … God, what do I want? I want to feel the sun on my face and paint the clouds and hear the music in the trees and love myself and love someone else and just feel perpetually beautiful.

But that requires the $14.99 waterproof, fire-retardant, Grade-5-hurricane-resistant mascara, not the tube that’s two bucks in Lane 4.

My shoes are dirty and outdated, but that’s how I like them. I like these shoes. They’re comfortable. Why do I need new, expensive, fashionably appealing shoes in order for someone to say, “Hey dogg, you look nice today”?

And why is it that whenever I get deathly bored and slather cheap, pore-clogging makeup all over my face everyone suddenly says, “Wow, you look pretty!”? Since when is “pretty” about whale blubber and cocoa butter?

I’ll tell you one thing, though. I most definitely am not crying about some stupid XY.

Definitely not.

I’m crying for all the whales that have to give up their fatty insulation so that some fugly anorexic super bitch can paint herself pretty every freaking day, giving him something halfway decent to oggle all the time.

Seriously, I’m not leaking saltwater over a guy.

I just think it’s cruel and unfair that the fat-endowed marine life population doesn’t even get the slightest warning that they’ll soon be on a cosmetics endcap at K-Mart.

He could have at least broken it to me gently, you know? We’ve been friends since the George Bush/Al Gore debacle.

I mean come the Bette Midler on.

I spill my blood, guts, and viscera out to this guy and he throws down the “Let’s just be friends” card without a second thought?

It’s just … it’s common courtesy to ease someone into heartbreak, not smash it over their head like a whiffleball bat.

You know what? I’m going to take my $1.99 checkout Lane 4 mascara and chuck it right at her big, stupid square head.


The author's comments:
This is literally an excerpt from my journal, so it's a little different when it comes to writing style.

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This article has 476 comments.


on Oct. 2 2010 at 8:17 am
SKSK1214 BRONZE, Davie, Florida
1 article 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
"And suddenly we see that love costs all we have and will ever be. Yet its only love which sets us free.", & "If we don't believe theres reason for living then we'll never know."

Its so not about a guy... LOL JK it is.

on Oct. 2 2010 at 1:23 am
Dragonscribe BRONZE, West Lafayette, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;A Person&#039;s a Person no Matter how Small&quot;<br /> and<br /> &quot;A Rose by Any Other Name Would Smell as Sweet&quot;<br /> and<br /> &quot;God helps those who help themselves&quot;

to what ebonykitty says...

how is a world with rainforests and mountains and oceans and sky and people and animals and beauty be godforsaken?

but about the dreams, I'm with you there.


on Oct. 2 2010 at 1:20 am
Dragonscribe BRONZE, West Lafayette, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;A Person&#039;s a Person no Matter how Small&quot;<br /> and<br /> &quot;A Rose by Any Other Name Would Smell as Sweet&quot;<br /> and<br /> &quot;God helps those who help themselves&quot;

This is from your journal? It's true?

I know how you feel - I never where makeup because whenever I do I may look prettier but I start crying because it's just not me. I want to be pretty without needing to paint myself into something else.


on Sep. 10 2010 at 7:48 pm
SimplyRachel PLATINUM, Charlotte, North Carolina
48 articles 6 photos 40 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift, that&#039;s why we call it the present.&quot;<br /> ~Unknown<br /> &quot;Things change, friends leave, and life doesn&#039;t stop for anybody.&quot;<br /> ~Stepgen Chbosky

Nice job, I totally know where your comeing from. If that makes sence.

on Sep. 10 2010 at 7:06 pm
RavenBird SILVER, Battle Ground, Washington
7 articles 3 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same&quot; ~The Fray &quot;All at once&quot; <br /> &quot;I am who I am and who i wanna be&quot; ~Avril Lavigne

I know exactly what you're talking about.

SarahBelle said...
on Sep. 10 2010 at 5:34 pm
SarahBelle, White Bluff, Tennessee
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;It&#039;s like a little piece of Canada in the middle of Virginia&quot;

Great piece! I love the point of view and it's very well written. And the powerful reference to a common object (like the $1.99 mascara) really puts an edge to the work. I love it :)

on Sep. 10 2010 at 5:03 pm
sleepingsoundly BRONZE, Unknown, Massachusetts
3 articles 0 photos 15 comments

i completely agree with this article. dangit, never waste your time over an unappreciative guy! i like that you kept referencing the $1.99 mascara, too.

 

check out "weakling". it has a similar voice, but a different idea.


on Sep. 10 2010 at 4:11 pm
diaphragm BRONZE, Tallahassee, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 86 comments
Nice! Love your style =)

Emmy13329 GOLD said...
on Sep. 10 2010 at 3:08 pm
Emmy13329 GOLD, Middletown, Delaware
10 articles 0 photos 26 comments

I love this ..it's true i really agree with everything u said ,good job,don't  u dare stop:)

-EM


AbbieLou GOLD said...
on Sep. 10 2010 at 1:46 pm
AbbieLou GOLD, Warrington, Other
11 articles 0 photos 22 comments

Favorite Quote:
&#039;The problem is not that we aim to high and miss it, but that we aim to low and reach it&#039;

Your Story is amazing, your so talented. Never stop!

on Sep. 10 2010 at 12:04 pm
pinkypromise23 PLATINUM, Cranston, Rhode Island
30 articles 0 photos 412 comments

Favorite Quote:
i know that you believe you understand what you think i said, but im not sure you realize that what you heard is not what i meant.

this is amazing and i espically love the title(:

.babycakes. said...
on Sep. 10 2010 at 9:48 am
i really love the way you worded things. you choose to actually describe things which made it more interesting to read.honestly i read a small preview of this and i felt this urge that i had to read it. it must be interesting at some level. which it definately was. actually reading this almost makes me not want to wear make-up anymore. i dnt feel like im a plastic prep or anything but i do enjoy wearing makeup. definately not as much as some girls where they actaully look fake as you described. although i do like mixing shades together and looking nice.all girls should be able to look beautiful, makeup or not.

on Aug. 24 2010 at 7:47 am
haventy0uheard PLATINUM, Kings Park, New York
28 articles 0 photos 186 comments
I love this. So much. It's entertaining and filled with raw emotion...oh and I love the title haha. Very creative! Check out my work if you (or anyone else that sees this) want to, feedback is much appreciated =]

on Aug. 19 2010 at 9:47 pm
I love your pice very much. But, I thought it was a little wobbly. It made me confused when you went to the whales then the liking of a boy and then queen bees. But, at the end it started making sense on what you were talking about. The writing is awesome and it sounds truly from the heart. Great job!

on Aug. 19 2010 at 9:32 pm
HippieNamedAnna PLATINUM, Kansas City, Missouri
21 articles 7 photos 90 comments

Favorite Quote:
Let It Be-The Beatles<br /> Music is the only thing that makes sense any more-Me<br /> Make love, not war-a bunch of people<br /> Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one&#039;s for you-Me :)

wow. great!

on Aug. 19 2010 at 8:33 pm
Shminkanator5000 SILVER, Rochester, New York
9 articles 0 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;the only thing we have to fear is fear itself&quot;

it's hard to believe that this is from your journal, I found it hilariously sarcastic at times and I loved how you worded everything and stayed consistent with the 1.99 mascara bit. ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT!

on Aug. 19 2010 at 10:48 am
liv.laf.love13 SILVER, El Paso, Texas
5 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
MUSIC IS THE CURE!!

This is wonderful! I love the point that its trying to make its so true!! LUV IT

Coffee BRONZE said...
on Aug. 18 2010 at 5:09 pm
Coffee BRONZE, Tallahassee, Florida
4 articles 5 photos 184 comments

Favorite Quote:
Your Face.

love it, and love her point of view. love the end, and the character. great job.

on Aug. 18 2010 at 12:35 pm
LadyInBlack BRONZE, Randallstown, Maryland
1 article 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
We are all the same because we all think that we are different,

Lol, kinda comical, I love it.. Don't need makeup to be pretty, actually females look better without it ! Natural beauty. Touches alot of topics, I likeee. ;)

Nicole A. said...
on Aug. 4 2010 at 11:03 pm

ok so i het the part about he whales dieing for makeup and the queen bees wearing it everyday just for a guy but hen you talk about this guy so wait did he dumb you for some qeen bee because if not that dosent make much sence but it is crazy about the make up stuff absolutley crazy but it was written well

:)