Ingredients: 

4 cups of Supplemental Essays
1 cup of The Common App
½ cup of stress (1 tbsp for garnish)
2 tsp of nerves
1 lb of essay drafts
A sprinkle of relief/happiness (optional topping)

Directions: 

1. Sift together your plans and ideas into a large mixing bowl. Make sure to use imagery and descriptive words to allow others to feel your story. Throw away excess words that are not needed (in the sifter). Substitute powerful verbs to make the flavor greater.

2. Carefully add the first 4 ingredients. Make sure to stir gently so that your mixture will not spill over the word count.

3. Slowly grate and then fold in a ½ cup of stress. Finish one essay at a time. Ignore the lack of motivation and fried-brain feelings. Take small breaks if necessary and refuel the brain. Avoid the urge to sleep.

4. Read through 1 lb of essay drafts. make sure all directions are followed as stated. You can taste the batter if you want to make sure everything is right.

5. Carefully stir one last time, as the ingredients will be judged by others. According to CollegeVine, these essays can take anywhere from 20-30 hours as you need to carefully choose a prompt, brainstorm ideas, organize your thoughts, draft, edit, re-draft, edit again, and so on.

6. Bake mixture at 400 degrees at medium heat. It is now out of your control. You did your best and it is
now up to your grades, test scores, and recommendations. Try and settle the nerves, knowing you will see the final product soon.

7. Patiently wait approximately 2-3 months for the mixture to settle. You can keep checking the oven window with the light if you become very anxious to hear the final product. Depending on how strong your oven is, you may be able to pull it out early.

8. Before taking out the final product, mix 1 tsp of nerves and 1 tbsp of stress. Garnish if needed.

9. If the extra flavor is needed to celebrate or lighten the mood, add a sprinkle of relief/happiness. Nerves will be present when opening the letter. You will see either “Congratulations!” or “We are sorry to inform you…” Either way, tears are possible.

10. If you pass the taste test, cut and serve the final product and share it with family and friends. Know that all of your hard work has paid off. You are going to college! Wow, what a huge stress reliever.